So, couture's not really my thing to be honest. I like stuff I can point to and say 'hey! I could wear that' and giant skirts with crazy stuff draping off them aren't generally good for going to uni in.
But at heart, every cisgendered, heteronormative girl loves enormous dresses that look like they should be worn by princesses. Or at least I do.
So, here are my favourites from the spring couture lines:
Alexis Mabille
The patterns are so cute and colourful and I love the shapes - especially the use of the mesh-stuff on the neckline of the dress, it creates this gorgeous illusion that the dress is just floating on her.
The blue dress is the most stunning colour and continues on the neckline effect from the last dress. It looks like the sort of thing Liv Tyler wears while she just hangs around her house (Liv Tyler is just Arwen in my head). The dress on the right is such an unusual creation which has so many elements in it. I think the earrings tip the ensemble into over-the-top category, but without them it would be a perfect balance.
I want both of these. Now please. I would keep the red one in my closet (or maybe hanging in my living room) for when I eventually marry Scarlett Johanson and wear the black one to work (it's black isn't it?)
They're so dramatic, but in a simple way which I love. Also I want to live my entire life in that shade of red.
Except when I'm at work. In the black dress.
Armani Privé
This sort of thing really isn't usually my style. All futuristic and structured. But OH MY WORD Armani can do it. (I LOVE the shiny leggings)
These colours are stunning and the shape of the bodice on the right blows my mind. I want the shoulders on the left too.
The hats are weird, but the rest of the pieces just seem too perfect to me - like they're from comic books. I can't even talk about the dress on the right, it is quite possibly the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. And I'm including that Marchesa dress in that assertion.
I mean, look at them? I would never wear any of these and I can't imagine anyone else wearing them either. But I just can't stop staring.
Bouchra Jarrar
I've never heard of this designer and I don't have much to say about her designs, except that they're so cute!
Christian Dior
HOLY WOW. Galliano pulled it out of the bag this time.
SO MUCH SASS. I love these models. They're so 'I don't give a fuck.' And they're helped in that by these truly fabulous dresses. They remind me of Carmen Sandiego.
Such a great contrast between the massive colourful dresses and these more muted ensembles. The way these drape is so elegant, very 'look at me, I'm Audrey Hepburn'
The dress on the left is so beautiful, simple on the top and so pouffy on the bottom. And whoever decided to put that blue and that pink together on the right should be knighted.
"Every duke and earl and peer is here, everyone who should be here is here, what a smashing, positively dashing, spectacle the Ascot Opening Day" really sums up how I feel about these dresses.
Elie Saab
The couturier-célèbre of the Red Carpet (I made up that French, so if it's wrong, I'm sorry) is always amazing and this selection is no exception.
AHUBBAHUBUHAH. Same colour. Two looks. One giant Caitlin-loves-face.
Christina Hendricks would wear the shit out of the one on the left. I don't care how pink it is and how red her hair is, it would look AH-MAY-ZING. Clearly they'd have to adjust the bust.
I can see Nicole Kidman wearing the one on the right, she'd look like the ice queen.
The one on the right: WAAAAAAAAANT. Except I'd have to take it up to the point where it would be a top on this model (I'm short).
So cuuuuuuute! I love the Edwardian shapes, they take just enough of the good stuff from that era and mix it with contemporary stuff.
Jean Paul Gaultier
I'm not generally a JPG fan but I like some of this season's stuff. It's not quite as ridiculous as it normally is.
I want that dress/coat thing on the left soooo much. I would be so badass on the bus in that. The one on the right is a weird cut, but I love the idea of throwing the tulle on the neckline to sass up a classic look.
SO MANY SPARKLES. I really hope it's a sequin bodysuit, because I would just wear it around the house. If someone comes to the door, they'll get a fabulous sequinny me. The dress is WEIRD, but weirdly amazing so I thought I'd better include it.
The difference between left and right is obviously striking, but they somehow seem similar to me. Like two sides of the same era.
Oh my word the dress on the right, the dress on the right. Nineties school-lunchbox colours on a ballgown.
Genius.
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